Thursday, February 7, 2008

Welcome to my little world of dorkiness

Admittedly, it's usually the small things in life that make me smile, excite me and make me happy. Sequels to movies, finding a quarter on the ground, a musician coming out with a new cd after a long hiatus, a warm towel just out of the dryer. However, it's only a handful of those things that truly make me a dork. And here would be a few for the list.

Financial planning. When someone starts talking about wanting to be able to save money or how to budget their bills and expenses, I automatically start making mental notes in my head of ways they could do just that. In fact, most times I jokingly say that I'd be more than willing to help set up a budget, but really I'm not joking. I love to sit down with a set amount of money and figure out a way that a person can pay off what they need to each month, have enough to buy the things that maybe they just want for the sake of wanting, and can sock away some money into their savings account each month as well.

Reunion tours. I love music of all ages. And I love it when the classics who have parted ways or just grown out of their genre (boy bands for example) decide to come back for one last hoorah. I'm glad to see that the Backstreet Boys put out another album last year (and can only hope that maybe one day NSync will do just one more together). But nothing can top the one definite and one rumored announcement that have come out in the news in the past two weeks. The first: it's being rumored that the New Kids on the Block are going to be doing a reunion tour this year. Their website is up and running again, albeit nothing more at this point than their Hangin' Tough video and a teaser video set to a sample of a song they recorded back in November. But I am so excited at the prospect. Don't think I won't be buying tickets the day they go on sale for a show close to home. And secondly, Cher will begin a three year stint at Caesar's in Las Vegas beginning in May. I've always wanted to visit Vegas in the first place, but to know that I can go see Cher live in concert makes me that much more motivated to do it soon. I love that woman. And Jack's impressions of her on Will and Grace.

English papers. At one point while growing up, I wanted to be several variations of an english major- novelist, journalist, editor. And although none of those quite came to fruition, I still enjoy editing a good paper for a college class when I get the chance. Kent has had me enlisted as his queen of revision for some time now, and I recently got the chance to help Dre compose a letter that will hopefully be her saving grace for graduating in May. There's just always been something special to me abotu sitting down with a pencil and a fresh printout of a project and just seeing how much I could elaborate on something. Even if it wasn't my own work. And of course point out all those "then/than, your/you're, its/it's" mistakes :)

And of course, there's always the little things that you only think about when someone mentions them. The fact that I now punch in phone number incorrectly because the keypad is arranged differently than a 10 key calculator, or that when I offered to go to the grocery store with Emily I got excited when I said "I have a great little calculator I got for Christmas that you can use." The fact that i could spend hours just looking at different kinds of material for all the quilts I want to make in my mind, how I like to arrange my movies and cd's in alphabetical order, and how I always look forward to stuff like Rock Band and DDR. I heart being a dork sometimes :)

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Love and the marriage

For as long as I can remember, I've always had the big plans of getting married one day. Of course the first draft of that plan would have put me being called by a new last name for about a year now, and obviously that thought was thwarted somewhere along the way.

Even up until the last four or five months, I still had that vision of the perfect man, wedding, house, animals, and kids in my head, but something suddenly changed. I think it may have been my biological clock being kicked out of the driver's seat by my subconscious saying that I haven't yet lived all I should independently. Soley independent, to be more specific.

It's not that I don't feel like I can achieve goals that I set long ago, or even just yesterday if there's a significant other in my life with some sort of permanancy. Or that I won't be able to travel and see the places and friends I've been planning for so long. Or that I'll somehow lose my ability to be spontaneous and just go with the wind when the moments are right. But I do know that there comes a certain point in life when dealing with that special someone you have to start making decisions based on the two of you collectively and not just yourself anymore. No waking up on Friday mornings to say to yourself "I think I'll book a ticket out to Seattle for two weeks from today to go visit John" without having to consult anyone to see if there are other plans or hesitations. No staying out until all hours of the night at your friends' houses without calling someone to say where you are so that they don't worry. Or blow up your phone all night.

As I was explaining to someone the other night, I wonder at this point if my independence is going to hinder me from allowing someone else to have 100 percent of me. If I'm goign to be forever gunshy of making that final lasting commitment for the fact that it's no longer just about me, it's about us. I don't say that in a selfish manner, as if I don't want to share my life with someone else. I say it in a control manner. I don't ask permission. I don't like being restricted in who my friends can be. I want to know how much money is being spent where and what's set aside for various expenses/savings/disposable income. I just don't like not knowing what's going on in any given situation. Which ultimately means I hate being vulnerable.

I know that with time, my heart will be healed and more keen on letting people in. That my insecurities about myself and my future will be gone. And that all the issues I come up with inside my head to just make life so much more complicated than it should be will subside. Until then, I suppose I'll just ask for some patience of others, and to not give up on me. Independent lady or not :)

Monday, February 4, 2008

Ah, those Mannings

I preface this post by saying that I am a Bengals fan first and foremost. Carson Palmer and TJ Houshmandzadeh will always be my top picks. However, I cannot deny Peyton Manning the fact that he's one of the best quarterbacks out there, in my opinion. With this said, i would have rather seen him and the Colts in last night's matchup, however I'm happy that it was his brother Eli that was able to kick Tom Brady's ass. Granted, it's not like it was a blowout by any means, but I'll call a win an ass kicking if I so please, three points up or not.

I admit that I didn't watch a lot of the game due to a combination of peopel standing in my line of sight and just conversation with meg, Dre and Michael. I didn't even see a lot of the commercials actually. And I think this is partially because there weren't really that many that caught my eye long enough to keep me watching. The Dalmation training the horse, Justin Timberlake, and the Dortios commercial are about the only three (well besides the Cashews one that was just disturbing to me) that I fully remember. Budweiser definitely did not have an equal to last years "Rock, Paper, Scissor for the last Bud Light" and then the guy gets hit over the head with a rock.

It really comes down to the fact that Super Bowl Sunday gives friends a chance to get together and spend quality time bonding over football, food, beer pong, pool, whatever. Although Meg and I are convinced that it shoudl be Super Bowl Saturday that way so many people don't have to call in to work on Monday because they've got a hangover :)